Why asking for help is a strength
“Vulnerability is not weakness. And that myth is profoundly dangerous.” Brene Brown
Have you ever had a time where you struggled to open up and ask someone for help?
Do you know anyone that still struggles to ask people for help?
The reality is that most people hesitate to ask for help from others because they think that it will make them weak. Most people want to prove themselves, and don’t feel comfortable opening up and being vulnerable with others and admitting that they need help.
Some people would rather fail at a task, stay lost, and lose time than to stop and ask someone for help.
Asking people for help has been perceived as a weakness, which is an attribute that people think will cause them to lose credibility and influence with others. While in reality, being vulnerable actually allows people to be more likely to support and follow your leadership because vulnerability is simply being transparent.
Opening up and asking for help builds credibility with others to allow them to see that you are willing to do whatever it takes to be successful, and you won’t let your pride or ego get in the way.
The problem is most people are conditioned to try to figure things out on their own. This was made evident during a recent strategic planning session that I was leading for a church in Nashville.
I started the session asking the group if they had any fires that they needed to have addressed. The reason why I do this is because it’s impossible to build a house in the middle of a fire. You have to put the fire out, and then you can build something new. That’s why I start my sessions with a “Fire Fighting Workshop” before we add anything new.
To my surprise, every person on the staff had issues that they needed help with! The amazing thing about every fire was the fact that no one else on the staff knew that anyone else is in the middle of a fire. No one opened up and shared their challenges or struggles. The other interesting thing was that someone else on the team easily solved the situations to every individual fire!
The team didn’t realize that leveraging the skills, gifts, and experience from the team, rather than trying to figure it out on their own could easily solve their fire.
What fires are you currently facing that you are trying to solve alone?
Who can you reach out to an be transparent and vulnerable to ask for help?
Realize that any problem you have that you can’t solve easily, is a problem that can be solved easily with the help of someone else.
Asking for help is no different than an athlete asking his coach for help to master a skill so they can be more effective in a game. Being coaching is an attribute that we see as a necessary component for success. Choose to be coachable, vulnerable, and transparent by asking for help.